Wanting More
by blackindiaink
Summary: Late night texts and all the feels. Bechloe prompt from Tumblr


_"Can we talk?"_

The text came at midnight, I was sitting in the booth at the radio station, trying not to fall asleep. It wasn't odd to get a text from Chloe this late, and in fact we had been in the middle of a text conversation not two hours ago when she had suddenly stopped replying. I felt my insides sink a little as if a cloud full of thunderstorm had just deposited itself right in my stomach.

I hesitated before I typed a reply. I don't do feelings, if you get close enough to me you realize this and usually move on... unless you're Chloe. Jesse had realized it two days ago when he broke up with me, saying that I was always distracted or I didn't pay enough attention. Basically, he couldn't put up with my need for space.

I tapped the fingers of my free hand against the counter. I hadn't told anyone about the break up yet and I'm sure Jesse had only told Benji so that couldn't be why Chloe wanted to talk. I looked up as fear seized my body, unless Jesse had realized that our issues had more to do with my feelings for someone else than indifference towards him. Then he might have spilled his guts to someone who couldn't keep their mouth shut.

I sighed and typed out a reply. _"Sure, at work right now. When?"_ I swiveled around in the chair and dropped my phone where I had just been tapping out the beat to Titanium. My mind was racing and I went back to the control board to distract myself from the anxiety of not knowing. Then I heard a buzz, my phone viciously vibrated at me.

When I picked it up I paused. It had taken me too long to get a clue about being totally into this girl. It was probably too late... no, I had to stop thinking like that. I had been fighting my negativity all day, trying to believe that I could have happiness. I was trying to give in to this overwhelming new thing called love but it didn't come naturally to me. Every time I let myself feel it something in my subconscious seemed to kick in and close the door again.

I looked down at the phone. _"I'm coming up._" Of course, Chloe was going to come without making sure it was okay. That would annoy the hell out of me if anyone else did it but I was surprised to find myself smiling the secret smile of adoration. It would take her ten minutes tops to get to the radio station so I sat back and tried to keep calm.

Xx

As soon as I heard the banging I shot out of my seat and jogged for the door. I could see Chloe through the glass door, looking perfect. She always managed that, no matter what she was wearing. With makeup or without, in gym clothes or skinny jeans - it didn't matter - she was gorgeous. My heart hammered as I unlocked the door. She was wearing a BU t-shirt and sweats, her pink and blue neon running shoes squeaked as she walked in from the recently rained on street. Her hair was pulled into a loose ponytail and I couldn't help but reach out and move a stray wave of red away from her face.

She cleared her throat and moved further into the room. It had been like this with us for awhile. I had quickly given in to her touchy nature and more often than not we each found these little ways of having physical contact with each other. It was like a compulsion, like I needed to know she was real.

Sometimes the possibility that she might not really exist felt so strong and that was when I would give in and text her or find her between classes even though our schedules took us to opposite ends of campus. I had been late to many a class just because I needed to see her.

This is why I didn't deserve her. I was that horrible person who kept someone stringing along because they were too dense to realize that they were in love with someone else. I felt the ache of disappointment, mostly in myself. So, I wouldn't try, because even if she did like me back, even a little bit, I had already wrecked it.

She was nervously pacing as waited. I had never seen her like this and it was too much for me to take so I stepped into her path and stopped her with two gentle hands on her shoulders.

"What's the matter, Chloe?"

She looked into my eyes and I shuddered. There was so much there, unlike my eyes, which gave away very little. "Beca?" She said it like she was lost and couldn't even give me a clue of how to find her. "I can't do this anymore," she said. Her body spun away from me and she sat down in the chair behind the reception desk.

"What do you mean," I asked.

She crossed her arms and looked up. "The late night texts, sleeping in the same bed, how we act with each other... you have a boyfriend, Beca." Her words hung heavy between us.

"But Chloe..." I was about to tell her about the break up but she didn't let me finish.

"No, Beca, it's not right. And it's not just that. It's..."

She looked up at me pleading. For once she didn't want to reveal herself but she continued. "Don't you know?," she paused looking for some recognition but all I could do was shake my head. "I'm in love with you, idiot."

My chest burst open in a flood of emotion, to many to name, all mixing and blending together like some kind of molten lava pool. I had no idea what expression I was wearing but it must have been hard to read because she turned away again and after a moment started for the door.

"Wait," I yelled.

She slowed but put her hand on the door handle. "I just can't be that close to you anymore, knowing that I can't have you. Seeing you with Jesse," she sighed, "makes me crazy sometimes."

I placed a hand on her arm. "Chloe, listen to me." I pulled her around to face me, making sure our eyes met. "Jesse and I broke up." Her eyes widened and a small spark of hope burned in her eyes. "And I kind of love you too." It came out in a rush and I was surprised that I had confessed my deepest secret so easily. I felt my face flush.

"Really," she breathed, "tears spring to her eyes."

I reached up to caress her cheek, the feeling of her smooth skin permeating my senses. "Really," I replied. I ran my thumb along her lip. I kept the touch light, just to feel the sensation of electricity prickle between us. Her head leaned towards mine and for once I didn't hesitate to let someone get close. Her lips were so soft and I yielded to her kiss, bliss taking away the last thoughts of the moment.


End file.
